38 Great Things About The Crow

1. NIGHTMARE INSPIRING HAPPINESS

2. NO SKIMPING ON CGI CROWS

3. STREET-WISE TOUGH KID (I.E. DICK TRACY)

4. LOOKS A LOT LIKE SPAWN

5. GREAT CROW POV,

ALTHOUGH THEY SKIMPED ON IT

6. JEFF HARDY IMPRESSION 7. INSPIRED STING'S

(THE PRO WRESTLER--NOT THE SINGER)

OUTFIT

8. KNIFE-CATCHING

9. PUSSIEST SOUNDTRACK EVER!
(SEE: MY LIFE WITH THE THRILL KILL KULT,
PANTERA AND ROLLINS BAND)

10. LOOK! IT'S THE BLACK GHOSTBUSTER!

11. LOOK! IT'S WALTER FROM THE WARRIORS!

("HE SHOT CYRUS!")

12. LOOK! IT'S LORD NIKON FROM HACKERS!

13. ANTAGONIST TURNED INTO KITCHEN ACCESSORY

14. VENGEANCE

15. FOUR CANS OF GASOLINE EQUALS THIS

16. THE BAD GUYS HAVE NAMES LIKE FUNBOY, TIN TIN, AND TOP DOLLAR

17. MAIN BAD GUY LOOKS LIKE

GARY OLDMAN HAD A BABY WITH

TABOO FROM BLACK EYED PEAS

18. CAMERON DIAZ TURNED DOWN THE ROLE

OF SHELLY BECAUSE SHE DIDN'T LIKE THE SCRIPT

19. THE JOKES: "JESUS CHRIST WALKS INTO A HOTEL.

HE HANDS THE INNKEEPER THREE NAILS AND ASKS

'CAN YOU PUT ME UP FOR THE NIGHT?'"

20. THE CROW POSSESSES THE POWER TO

WILL MORPHINE OUT OF A WHORE'S ARM

21. EPILEPTIC MINDREADING FLASHBACKS

22. PROOF THAT BRANDON LEE'S CAREER
WAS ON THE SAME TRACK AS BRANDON LEE

23. THE REALLY GREAT DIALOGUE

24. PATRIOTIC ROOFTOP GUITAR SOLO

25. LOOKS LIKE DARK CITY26. T-BIRD, WE HARDLY KNEW YE

27. THIS

28. VIGILANTE JUSTICE

29. GRIZZLED-FACED LIEUTENENT

30. AND DON'T FORGET THIS! 31. FANTASTIC SETS 32. THE DETROIT ARSONIST LEAGUE 33. STARRING HEATH LEDGER AS THE JOKER 34. COPS WHO CONSTANTLY SAY "WHAT THE CRAP?"

35. THE CROW IS SO 1990'S

THAT EVEN PEOPLE WHO'VE NEVER SEEN IT BEFORE

FEEL NOSTALGIC

36. JUMPING FROM ROOFTOP TO ROOFTOP

IN SLOW MOTION

37. ALL THE BEST SCENES TAKE PLACE DURING RAINSTORMS

38. EXCEPT FOR THE SCENES

THAT TAKE PLACE DURING

MONEY STORMS